Whenever you are working on improving yourself, your mental health, and the quality of your relationships I believe that self-help is essential. It contributes to therapy and personal growth by adding additional insight. I recommend these resources to all of my clients who need them. I have group them according to the issue that they address. Each of these I have read myself. And although the titles may refer to one gender versus another, I find that the concepts can be equally applied regardless of gender. Thus, I recommend texts for all of my clients.
This list isn't an all inclusive, but they are books that I frequently recommend and find to be extremely insightful to my clients. When reading books that are recommended, I suggest that you take notes and highlight "aha moments" so that you can process what is coming up for you. It is also a good idea to journal about these thoughts that come up, and address the issues which may have triggered you in therapy.
For Commitment Phobias
Men Who Can't Love: How to Recognize a Commitment Phobic Man Before He Breaks Your Heart by Steven Carter and Julia Sokol
Getting to Commitment by Steven Carter and Julia Sokol
He's Scared She's Scared by Steven Carter and Julia Sokol
The Emotionally Unavailable Man by Patti Henry
Toxic Relationships and Codependency
Women Who Love Too Much by Robyn Norwood
Toxic Relationships: How to Regain Lost Power in Your Relationship by Kimberly Brasher
Toxic Men: 10 ways to Identify, Deal With, and Heal from the Men Who Make Your Life Miserable by Lillian Glass
Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life by Dr. Susan Forward
Emotional Blackmail: When People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You by Dr. Susan Forward
Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself by Melody Beattie
Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life by Marshall Rosenberg
For Abandonment, Attachment, and Trust Issues
Black Swan: The Twelve Lessons of Abandonment Recovery by Susan Anderson
The Journey From Abandonment to Healing by Susan Anderson
Emotional Unavailability: Recognizing It, Understanding It, and Avoiding It's Trap by Bryn Collins
Attached: Create Your Perfect Relationship with the Help of Three Attachment Styles by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by Sue Johnson
Anxiety and Mood Disorders
The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund Bourne
Mind Over Mood: Change How You Feel By Changing the Way You Think by Dennis Greenberger and Christine Pedesky
Anxiety + Depression: Effective Treatment of the Big Two-Occurring Disorders by Margaret Wehrenberg
Other Useful Tools
The Worry Box
24-Hour Crisis Resources
National Suicide Hotline (800) 273-8255
National Domestic Violence Hotline (800) 799-7233
John George Psychiatric Pavilion (510) 346-1300
Sliding Scale Counseling Services:
I understand that not all client's can pay for psychotherapy services. I have offered a list of low fee sliding scale community counseling services. Most of the clinics that offer sliding scale use therapist interns, thus they may not offer clinicians that are experienced and specialized in a specific issue.
Berkeley Therapy Institute
Open Path Psychotherapy Collective http://openpathcollective.org
Alameda County Behavioral Health Services
Working through anxiety, destructive thoughts and finding inner peace through gratitude
Tony Robbins at Oprah's Life-class
Struggling to get through Mother's Day? Was your mother abusive or neglectful towards you? Did you decide to sever the relationship because it was toxic? Do you feel out of place by everyone talking about their wonderful relationships with their mom, while your relationship was the exact opposite? Here are some ways to help you cope, and heal on a non-traditional Mother's Day.
Ever wonder if the person you are sleeping with is a narcissist? Here are some sexual signs, that your lover may be a narcissist.
Are you stuck in an abusive relationship, and can't get out of it? Do you feel like you are all alone and that with each passing day you slip further into despair? You are not alone, and abuse is not okay. Here are some tips that can help you navigate getting out of your abusive relationship.
It can be difficult to move on after a breakup, particularly if your ex is flaunting their happiness in front of you. Here are 7 tips that can help you pick up the pieces and move on with your life.
If you are still in a relationship with your parent who abused you during childhood, and have difficulty managing your interactions, here are some tips that can help.
If you were never shown love or affection as a child, there is a strong chance that has impacted your ability to express love and affection in your adult relationships. Here are 6 signs that you may be affectionately challenged in your relationships.
When we struggle with feelings of being unloved and unwanted in our relationships with our parents, it sets the standards for how we try and obtain love in our adult relationships. Here are some ways in which we try and obtain love in all the wrong ways....
Do you ever wonder why you end up in the same type of unhealthy relationships? Or why dysfunctional people continue to come in your life? Here are some reasons why people who are abusive are continuously drawn to you....
Feeling like you can't trust your partner? Have you turned into a detective, and spend all of your spare time checking up on your lover? Here are some reflections on why you should turn in your detective badge and focus on you.
If you were abused as a child, you may find that you engage in behaviors that are not beneficial to you or your relationships as an adult. Here are some things that you may be doing which could be reeking havoc on your life.